In nearly two-two-decades of working in the world of personal development and entrepreneurship I cannot tell you how many well-meaning husbands who genuinely love their spouses and want the best for them, have advised:
“You’re smart, you don’t need a coach. You can figure this stuff out on your own…
“You are perfect. You don’t need to do that program/training/development!..
Or my personal fav:
“I know a bit about business/have a tourism degree/lead teams, so just learn from me.”
Never ever do I recommend your spouse replace a mentor.
First, they are just too close to you, and have their “stuff” going on and in many ways want you to stay the same because it works for them. (With love, but this is TRUE).
Secondly, when we allow our spouse to make decisions for us we are COMPLETELY CUT OFF from our internal knowing and power!
Even if you’ve never heard something like this from your spouse who wants to keep you safe and “save you money,” maybe you’ve told it to yourself…
…That’s how dominated we are by “martyr” thinking, that we think our value is based on how much we can do alone!
What few people understand is that a great mentor will short cut time, struggle and actually help you MAKE money in the long run.
For the woman who wants to THRIVE, succeed faster, and make more money sooner (don’t pretend you don’t!) without blowing out your adrenals or your marriage, the SMARTEST THING you can do is allow yourself mentorship, community and support as you fulfill your purpose.
Will 2019 be your year???
It is a perfect time to take action to get the support and mentoring…and it is definitely NOT your spouse!
I mentor success focused, service-driven women who are solo-preneurs, transformational teachers, coaches, artists and heroines who wish to create more impact and income without sacrificing themselves!
P.S. I am taking a SMALL number of one-on-one clients in 2019 who wish to create amazing results, accelerate their income and make a bigger impact. Reach out to find out of that is for you at https://shastatownsend.com/apply/
P.P.S. Check out success stories of women like you saying YES to their success and what they are creating…
These are all responses I have heard myself and others say when faced with a decision.
And it’s all bullshit.
The thing is we are all born with an innate knowing.
We are born clear. We come forth with no shame or guilt about what we want or taking the next step to get it.
Think about it – when toddlers are learning to walk they don’t “have to sit with it” or “feel it in their body.”
They go for it, bruised noses and all. They have a relentless desire for more.
We all have a relentless Desire for more but we start to question it.
Later in life we start second guess everything. We take on the fears of our family, our culture, our friends and even our lovers.
We fear being judged, getting it wrong, making a mistake, ending up more broke/alone/wrong, so we “sit with it”.
Mistakes feel super painful so we avoid making one and thus decisions.
But you know what’s even more painful – REGRET!!
What if you had never taken the risk to learn to walk
Would you regret that?
YES! It sounds so ludicrous to even ask.
Nothing will change until we take the next step, and we can’t take a step by “sitting with it”.
We can take a step even with the fear.
Yes, we need to be discerning but most of us do KNOW what we want and even what the next step is for us, but we talk ourselves out of it.
One of the best things I taught myself was HOW TO MAKE A DECISION, QUICKLY.
Here’s My Formula for Making a Decision:
1.Be Clear On What You Want – So simple…but lots of people are afraid to claim what they want. So this is your permission to get clear and declare to yourself what you want!!!!!
For me, I got clear that in 2019 I wanted to be on more stages and on more media outlets so I could make a bigger impact. Simply, my goal in 2019 is to be on 20 great stages and media platforms. It WILL happen. I’ve made the decision.
What do you want? Define it clearly.
2.Pay Attention + Trust Universal Laws – One of the best things I ever did was study Universal Laws. I understand the Law of Vibration (aka Law of Attraction) – that what IS showing up in my experience – whether it is a coaching program, training, speaking gig or travel opportunity – is coming my way because of my Desire. I am literally in harmony with it. I can feel confident because if it was NOT meant for me it would NOT be in my experience.
If I use the same example as above, I had an opportunity to study with a world re-known speaking coach and I was an immediate YES.
I knew this man was showing up in my life at the perfect time because it was what I wanted. I made the decision and investment with ease because I KNOW he is here to help me in my vision. I literally manifested him so I was COMPELLED to trust that and take the next step.
What is showing up in your experience that could help you BE, DO OR HAVE what you really want?
3.NEVER Make Decisions Based on Money – I used to order the cheapest thing on the menu even if I didn’t want it. ACK. Now I order what I WANT.
I have learned to NEVER make decisions based on money or price point. In fact now if something is “too cheap” I don’t buy it because I’m pretty sure it won’t help me get the results I want (and I want to work with people who value what they do). A $99 program means $99 results. Do you want a Dollar Store kind of life? NOT ME!
Also, I hold myself accountable to create the money. So, I make a decision, Trust the Universal Laws and TAKE ACTION. This is also known as The Law of Cause + Effect. I don’t wait for the fairies of the Universe to rain down pennies from the sky. I CREATE them!!
What are you talking yourself out of because of the money? Ready to stop that?????
What resource / action / opportunity for money is already here?
As we approach 2019, it is a perfect time to notice the voices of fear, to make a decision about what you REALLY want, and then to take action to get the support to create it, now.
That’s the thing about support – a great mentor can help you literally collapse time.