Category Archives: Stories

Are you doing this creepy thing on FB? Marketing 101 Advice

I was creeped out! 


It was too much too soon.


The “here’s why I am so amazing and how I can help you so work with me NOW message that I’ve received not once but about 10x in the last 2 months through Facebook messenger.


If we’ve just become friends on Facebook, do not pitch me your services through direct message…not in the first 10-minutes and not in the first 10 hours.


It’s kinda creepy when I see your name pop up and I’ve just accepted your friend request. 


I don’t accept every friend request that comes my way. I do try to be discerning but if we’ve just met please don’t try to hump me.


Would you jump into bed with someone you just met in the produce aisle? 


Maybe, but if you’re asking me to hop into bed with you, unless you’re Javier Bardum, that’s not going to happen. 


I’m not saying don’t friend me.


I’m not saying don’t use Messenger to connect with people or even invite them to work with you.


I hate to sound critical since I do love a go-getter and those who ask for the sale, but there is a sophisticated way to do this. 


I’m just saying don’t be creepy. 


How to Use DMs Effectively:


  • Ensure you let “friends” warm to you. Don’t go in too fast or too hard. Don’t love bomb people (it feels inauthentic) and conversely don’t tell people you can “save” them (it’s patronizing and narcissistic).


  • Ensure you’re using it as a relationship tool. That is, invite people to have a conversation and not just hard sell. 


  • Ensure you’re talking about what’s in it for me and not just how amazing you might be.


  • Ensure you know who you’re talking to AKA do a little research. Please don’t pitch me parenting programs. I don’t have kids. Please don’t pitch me lesbian cruises. I’m in a monogamous relationship with a man and I hate boats. Please don’t pitch me life coaching when you haven’t figure out your own life.



I don’t usually write about effective marketing or sales techniques, but I’ve had so many ineffective and creepy DMs in the last 6 months I had to speak up. 


And I’ve also built 7-figure businesses through authentic relationship building and effective marketing so I hope to start sharing some of the wisdom for those who might benefit. 


Do you have an effective way you have used DM to connect with prospects and be in service? Please HIT reply and let me know. I’ve love to hear.


Authentic Marketing – Wanna Know? 


I’m also in the planning stages of an intensive on “relationship marketing” and how to effectively create authentic connection and utilize social media and other networks to build sales without being creepy.


Are you interested in learning deets about then when it’s launched?  


Click here to be added to the first-to-know list. 


Wishing you abundant success,



What Super Grover, dick pics + bad behavior have in common!

I am not sure what mojo I had going on, but in one day I received no less than four penis pics on social media. 

This was a new experience for me.

I have received unwanted friend requests, marriage proposals and male advances through social media (and in person) but no eggplant images.

I have to say it was a SHOCK. 

A friend of mine says a flaccid penis looks a little like the Sesame Street character Grover, perhaps the least sexy Sesame Street character!

Apparently, I am not alone in receiving dick pics.

I joked on my personal Facebook page that I had “made it” as I was now receiving unsolicited creep show images and a LOT of women commented that they had been on the receiving end of such bad behavior too.

The thing about unwanted attention and bad behavior is disturbing and subtle way it can erode a woman’s feeling of safety, sexuality and even autonomy.

I have to be honest that I felt “violated”, targeted and angry…Not great aphrodisiacs.

I felt a little triggered too.

“WTF guys?  Are you totally fucking mental?”

I have worked hard to claim my sexuality and create a kick ass sex life where I feel both autonomous and adored and where I can be taken fully by a man I love and trust.

I could feel the old fear of “danger” arise that day. I am not sure if these pics are intended to intimidate, but I felt a moment of that.

“Did I somehow invite this?

“Are my photos too sexy, provocative?

“Am I giving off a vibe that I want this?…ie. coming across as a “whore”?

Women have been blamed for bad male behavior for centuries.

We tend to internalize that. We also tend to RAGE the fuck over it (for good reason), but I don’t want to do either.

Like 99% of all women I know, I have experienced sexual abuse and trauma, but I don’t want to live in that trauma.

I love men.

I love sex.

I love to be a radiant woman out in the world…

So, I took a deep breath. Looked at my husband, and said “They really don’t compare to you.”

I laughed, then I moved the FUCK ON!

I also took a moment to FEEL my own power as a woman –sexual, sensual, autonomous and totally alive.  No soft penis can take that away.

I REFUSE to hide, shrink or feel victimized from a couple of flaccid cocks on Instagram.

There is always going to be ridiculous behavior, and weirdos who have zero social skills, and every now and then I am going to meet up with them…but it has NOTHING to do with me.

So, if you are woman who somehow felt ashamed, shrunken or even mad as fuck at the RIDICULOUSNESS we still face, you are not alone.

But, I also invite you to consider how many gorgeous, powerful, and GREAT men are in your life.

I believe there is a revolution happening between men and women, and I want to be at the forefront of that which means taking responsibility for my reactions and my healing. Want to join me?

And, here’s to great men who know when to keep it in their pants!

Much love,

Shasta Townsend

Best-selling author, sensualist and unapologetic lover of leopard print

P.S. Send me social love

I would love and adore your gorgeous goddess energy and support on my
social media platforms. If you feel moved, I am @shasta.townsend on Instagram and friend me on Facebook

P.P.S Have a sister who could benefit from this post and honest share, please forward this to them or send them the link. #weallrise