“I can’t f&cking win!”
Have you ever caught yourself saying these words?
I sure have!
As a man who grew up “hardened” away from emotional sharing, I found it easier to get angry and identify with the Imbalanced Masculine side (self-evaluation graphic below).
It was an excuse to not be open or fully commit to my partner and be in an honest, co-creative relationship.
The Toxic Masculine would show up in me as:
- Losing my cool and saying things I didn’t mean.
- Not talking for days and literally “stone-walling” Shasta and others.
- Feeling alone and like the whole world was on my shoulders.
- Holding onto things from long ago – things that were said in the past and yet, I still “nursed” those old wounds.
Do any of these sound familiar?
The Imbalanced or Toxic Masculine in Love.
I learned and am still learning to break through these and take deep responsibility for myself as a man, a husband and a creator in the world.
My past is not something that I am proud of but it’s no longer something I am willing to shame myself about either.
It has helped me get to where I am today, and be in the relationship I am in with Shasta, and doing this work in the world now for men and women.
I use those experiences to be a more compassionate and loving husband, friend and leader.
Though our partner, employees/colleagues or family can challenge us in relationship, we must take the responsibility to look at the wounded places within us and stop the cycle of blame and victimization.
Last week Shasta shared her experience and the self-assessment for the Toxic or Imbalanced Feminine in Love. To read that again check it out now.
Again, these patterns can show up in women or men though men tend to display more of the Toxic Masculine and women more of the Toxic Feminine because of cultural conditioning.
Take a moment and honestly reflect if any of these patterns are within…no shame or guilt.
Man or Woman – Break Through the Toxic Patterns
If you want one-on-one support to create the results you long for in all areas of your life and want to heal these things FAST, then please reach out. Book a confidential call at https://go.oncehub.com/ShastaTownsend